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* Welcome to the Laughing Gas Newsletter! *







* A free and clean comedy newsletter sent *







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*   Vol. 5, Issue 8: Wed, Sep. 06, 2000   *







* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *







* Joke newsletter issued by Aha! Jokes















# I N  T O D A Y ' S  I S S U E















1. Can I borrow that?







2. Clinton visits the school















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# J O K E S  F O R  T O D A Y















1. Can I borrow that?















Every time the man next door headed toward







Robinson's house, Robinson knew he was coming







to borrow something. "He won't get away with







it this time," muttered Robinson to his wife.







"Watch this." 















"Er, I wonder if you'd be using your power-saw







this morning," the neighbor began. 















"Gee, I'm awfully sorry," said Robinson with







a smug look, "but the fact of the matter is,







I'll be using it all day." 















"In that case," said the neighbor, "you won't







be using your golf clubs, mind if I borrow







them?" 















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2. Clinton visits the school















Once, Bill Clinton visited a elementary school







to talk to a group of third graders.















He said to them, "Today we are going to discuss







the difference between a tragedy, a great loss







and an accident".















Then he said, "Can anyone give me an example of







a tragedy?"















A little boy raises his hand and says, "If a







kid runs out in the street after a ball and







gets hit by a car."















Clinton says, "No, that would be an accident.







Can anyone else try?"















A little girl raises her hand and says, "If a







busload of kids drove off a cliff."















Clinton says, "No, that would be a great loss.







Come on, anyone else?"















A boy raises his hand and says, "If you and Mrs.







Clinton were on a plane and it blew up."















Then Clinton says, "Well, Yes, but can you tell







me why it would be considered a tragedy?"















And the little boy says, "Well, it wouldn't have







been an accident, and it sure as heck wouldn't







have been a great loss." 















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