Lightbulb Jokes

Q: How many atheists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: None. They're never in the dark.




Q: How many Union Electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Eight. One to change the bulb, three to watch him work, one to supervise, one to make the tea, and two to phone in to say that they can't make it in to work today.




Q: How many British trades unionists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: None. They cannot interfere with the lightbulb's inalienable right to withdraw its labour.




Q: How many politically correct people does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: None. "Why should we impose our values on the lightbulb ? If it wishes to be a lightbulb of no light, we should respect its uniqueness and individuality."




Q: How many gay rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: None: The bulb shouldn't have to change for society to accept it.




Q: How many small-town people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Two, one to do it and a cop to make sure he isn't doing it too fast.




Q: How many suburbanites does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: One, but it has to look like every other light bulb on the block.




Q: How many residents of country towns does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?

A: None, they're afraid there's been too much development already.