Lawyer Jokes

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

A: Lawyers accumulate frequent flyer points.




Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist?

A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.




Q: What's the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon?

A: The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes.




Q: What's the difference between lawyers and buzzards?

A: Lawyers have removable wing tips.




Q: What's the definition of a lawyer?

A: A mouth with a life support system.




Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell?

A: No changes occur.




Q: What's the difference between God and an attorney?

A: God doesn't think he's an attorney.