Lawyer Jokes

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?

A: Just two, all the rest are true.




Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.




Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

A: An offer you can't understand.




Q: What is a criminal lawyer?

A: Redundant.




Q: How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Three--one to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.




Q: Why does California have the most attorneys, and New Jersey have the most toxic waste dumps?

A: New Jersey got first pick.




Q: What's black and brown and looks good on an attorney?

A: A doberman pinscher.