Political Jokes

Candidate Bill Clinton: Cut taxes for middle class

President Bill Clinton: Wants to raise them




Candidate Bill Clinton: Vowed not to tamper with Social Security

President Bill Clinton: Wants to tax more SS benefits




Candidate Bill Clinton: Proposed energy tax cuts

President Bill Clinton: Wants energy tax increases




Candidate Bill Clinton: Claimed he had the ability to raise $45 billion by making foreign corporations pay their fair share of U.S. taxes

President Bill Clinton: Modified and lowered his figure to only $11 billion




Candidate Bill Clinton: Proposed Medicare payment cut of only $4.4 billion and ran ads attacking Bush for recommending more cuts

President Bill Clinton: Wants at least $34 billion in Medicare cuts




Candidate Bill Clinton: Promised a guarenteed college education for anyone wanting one

President Bill Clinton: Proposing to spend $98 million--it will only cover 4,800 students in the freshman class at the University of Maryland




Candidate Bill Clinton: Promised 10% income surtax on millionaires

President Bill Clinton: Wants to impose the surtax on those with taxable incomes greater than $250,000




Candidate Bill Clinton: Would raise income taxes on families with incomes greater than $200,000

President Bill Clinton: Wants to raise income taxes on families with incomes greater than $30,000




Candidate Bill Clinton: Claimed to be able to reduce the deficit by taxing rich, foreigners, and corporate polluters

President Bill Clinton: Said he cannot reduce the deficit without taxing the elderly, motorists, and farmers




Candidate Bill Clinton: Promised workers he would require their employers to pay for retraining

President Bill Clinton: Put that idea on hold




Candidate Bill Clinton: Promised to increase minimum wage

President Bill Clinton: Wants to keep the wage the same




Candidate Bill Clinton: Attacked Bush's policy of sending illegal Haitians back to Haiti

President Bill Clinton: Decided to maintain Bush's policy on Haiti.




Candidate Clinton, campaign ad, January 1992

"I've offered a comprehensive plan to get our economy moving again....It starts with a tax cut on the middle class."




Candidate Clinton, Jan. 12, 1992

"I want to make it very clear that this middle-class tax cut, in my view, is central to any attempt we're going to make to have a short-term economic strategy."




President-elect Clinton, Jan 14, 1993

"From New Hampshire forward, for reasons that absolutely mystify me, the press thought the most important issue in the race was the middle class tax cut. I never did meet any voter who thought that."




President Clinton, first Oval Office address, Feb. 15, 1993

"I had hoped to invest in your [the middle class's] future...without asking more of you. And I've worked harder than I've ever worked in my life to meet that goal. But I can't."




Candidate Clinton, last presidential debate, Lansing Mich., Oct. 19, 1992

"The real mistake he [President Bush] made was the 'read my lips' promise in the first place. You just can't promise something like that just to get elected if you know there's a good chance that circumstances may overtake you."




President-elect Clinton, press conference, Jan. 14, 1993

"We have a structural deficit that is too high. The American people would think I was foolish if I said I will not respond to changing circumstances."