Holiday Jokes

Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Finney.


"Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!"


"Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are you callin' from?"




It was general question time on the "Top of the World" quiz show and the host first asked the Hungarian contestant:


"Complete this line of a song and spell your answer - Old MacDonald had a ...."


The Hungarian answered quickly: "Station - S T A T I O N."


Next it was the Polish contestant who was asked the same question:


"Old MacDonald had a ...."


"Ranch," was the reply, "R A N C H."


Finally the Irishman was asked the same question:


"Old MacDonald had a...."


"Farm," the Irishman proudly stated.


"Correct," said the host. "Now spell the word farm."


The Irishman thought for a moment. "E I E I O."