Lightbulb Jokes

Q: How many members of Marillion does it take to change a light-bulb?"

A: Well, I thought it was going to be something to do with Fish (as in the ubiquitous surrealists joke,) but in fact the answer was only 2, but first they had to figure out how Genesis would have done it. Apparently this would be hilarious to fans of these groups, who believe Marillion to be Genesis copycats.




Q: How many members of Take That does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: They can't sing, they can't dance so what makes you think they can change a lightbulb?




Q: How many contrabassoon players does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Five. One to hold the bulb and the other four to figure out the fingerings.




Q: How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Five. One to change it, and four to stand around going "Huh ! I could've done that !"




Q: How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: 5, one to do it and 4 to say that they liked it but would have done it a bit differently.




Q: How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: It can't be done. They only know how to twist things to the right.




Q: How many bassists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Five-one to do it and four to beat back all the guitarists who are trying to elbow him out of the spotlight.




Q: How many bassists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: None. The keyboardist does it with his left hand.