Lightbulb Jokes

Q: How many gardeners does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Three. One to change it and two to have a debate about whether this is the right time of year to be putting in lightbulbs or daffodil bulbs.




Q: How many gardeners does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Just one. The new light bulbs are just as easy to change as the older, heavier ones.




Q: How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

A: You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need.




Q: How many auto mechanics does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Six--one to force it with a hammer and five to go out for more bulbs.




Q: How many auto mechanics does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Two, one to screw in all the bulbs he has until he finds one that fits, and the other to tell you he thinks he'll have to replace the whole socket.




Q: How many Englishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: What do you mean change it? It's a perfectly good bloody bulb! We have had it for a thousand years and it has worked just *fine*.