Political Jokes

If a communist has two cows, he gives both to the government, and the government sells him some of the milk.


If a Socialist has two cows, he gives both to the government, and the government gives him some of the milk.


If a Nazi has two cows, the government shoots him, and takes both cows.


If a Capitalist has two cows, he sells one and buys a bull.


If a New dealist has two cows, he kills one, milks the other, and throws away the milk.


If a Liberalist has two cows, he sells them to the rich, then taxes them one cow and gives it to the poor.


If a Conservatist has two cows, he locks them up and charges people to look at them.


If an Atheist has two cows, he doesn't believe it.


If a Taoist has two cows, he lets them wander off.


If a Platonist has two cows, he looks for two others to milk.


If a Aristocrat has two cows, he sells them and buys one big one.


If a Pacifist has two cows, they stampede him.


If a government worker has two cows, he can't sell them, fire them, or even label them as cows.


If a Hillary Clinton has two cows, she robs the ranches and gives everyone two cows. If she doesn't have enough, she gives them bull.