School Jokes

M.I.T.: "I had a nervous breakdown this weekend."

"Have some fries."




Caltech: "I had three nervous breakdowns this weekend."

"Have some fries."




Yale: "I got mugged on the way to class today."

"Have some fries."




Brown: "I got a nose ring this weekend, Professor Smith."

"Cool! Me too! Have some fries."




Swarthmore: "I got a B."

"Anywhere else it would have been an A. Have some fries."




Princeton: "My father took away my Porsche this weekend."

"Poor dear. Have some Escargot."




Harvard: "Did you do anything this weekend?"

"Nope. Have some fries."




Williams: "Don't I know you?"

"Of course you do, silly. Have some fries."




Cornell: "I killed my lab partner this weekend."

"Bummer. Have some fries."




Columbia: "I wish I could be eating these fries at a better school."

"Me too. Let's go get shot."




Penn: "I wish I could be eating these fries at a better school."

"Me too. Let's transfer to Columbia."




Stanford: "Dude, I have so much work this weekend."

"Like, chill out, dude. Have some, like, fries."




Dartmouth: "Oh man, I got so trashed this weekend."

"Have some beer."




Tufts: "I wish I were Ivy League."

"Here, drink the fry grease."