Bumper Sticker Jokes

I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.


Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.


I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it.


Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.


Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.


I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.


Where there's a will, I want to be in it.


Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check?


Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.


We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?