Military Jokes

Things to Remember During a War


1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire.


2. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.


3. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at.


4. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat.


5. No combat-ready unit ever passed inspection.


6. Remember: your aircraft was made by the lowest bidder.


7. Never draw fire, it will irritate the rest of your formation.


8. Never share a cockpit with someone braver than you.


9. You are not Tom Cruise.


10. SAMs and AAA have the right-of-way.


11. If you aren't sure, the SAMs are pointed at you.


12. If hit, landing near the people that just shot you down is not a good idea.


13. Close only counts in horseshoes, nukes and proximity-fused missiles.


14. Smart bombs have bad days too.


15. The best defense is to stay out of range.


16. If you are short on everything but enemy, you are in combat.