Holiday Jokes

10. Boy, if I had not recently shot up four sizes, that would've fit.


9. It would be a shame if the garbage man ever accidentally took this from me.



8. Perfect for wearing in the basement.


7. Well, well, well...


6. I really don't deserve this.


5. Gosh, I hope this never catches fire!


4. I Love it, but I fear the jealousy it will inspire.


3. If the dog buries it, I'll be furious!


2. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the federal witness protection program.


1. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity.