Top List Jokes

Excuses To Use When Caught Sleeping At Work




They told me at the blood bank that this might happen.


This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to.


I was working smarter - not harder.


Whew! I must have left the top off the whiteout.


I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!


This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!


I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance.


I'm in the management training program.


I'm actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP). I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend.


This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!


I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress. Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga?


No! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem.


The coffee machine is broken....


Someone must have put decaf in the wrong pot.


Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off.


Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!


I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands.


The mail courier flipped out and pulled a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot.


Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day.


I'm just resting my eyes.