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Chem One-liners 03

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium and just couldn't put it down?


What's the formula for water? -H-two-O What's the formula for an ice cube? -H-two-O-CUBED


Q: What do you get when you combine Al Gore with O2?
A: Oxymoron


The best chemists would definitely not be pet owners.

Their idea of a catalyst:

2 bags of cat litter
3 cans of cat food
1 can of flea powder
1 collar


Q: How do you get lean molecules?
A:Feed them titrations.


Q: And why does a white bear melt in water?
A: Because it's polar.


Did you hear about the industrialist who had a huge chloroform spill at his factory?
His business went insolvent.


Q: What's the most important thing to learn in chemistry?
A: Never lick the spoon.