Lightbulb Jokes

Q: How many people at a London Vegans meeting does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: All thirty. Well, actually it's only one, but he has to wait at least half an hour while the others read out all the announcements.




Q: How many macrobiotics does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Three. One to make the coffee, one to get the cigarettes, and one to ask Michio Kushi for instructions.




Q: How many old macrobiotics does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Five. One to change it, three to hold the ladder, and one to call the ambulance.




Q: How many young macrobiotics does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: None. They all sit in a circle, watching the old macrobiotics, and think beautiful thoughts.




Q: How many holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: None, they just deny the bulb ever went out in the first place.




Q: How many Ethiopians does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Three. One to change it and two to squabble over who gets to eat the packaging.




Q: How many college students does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: I don't know. I forgot my calculator at home.




Q: How many university students does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Two. One to fuse all the electrics while doing something silly, and one to phone the landlord to ask for the lightbulb to be changed.